Hi Harold,
No worries enough have helped me.
There is no need to have a consist in the Con-Builder window to change the couplings just highlight (click once) on the item in either list. Then use the Edit/Edit this unit button.
See the 'EYE' button with the arrow. Click that to be able to choose which stock is displayed. This will make finding stock easier.
All tenders are named ending in "T". E.G. DR_BR_7F_53806T.wag Some use a standard tender to save file space and are not always obvious.
You can use the 'Consists making part of activities' menu button (looks like a steering wheel) to load the consist that has the stock item, with the coupling that needs to be changed, to the Con_Builder window. Then read the name from the consist icon to find it in the lists.
To turn a stock item round in a Consist. Right click on it so an arrow appears above the icon. This should not be necessary with consists for activities as they are when they were created. Unless the model was built the wrong way round it should orientate correctly.
Remember that the Coupling statements in the xxxx.eng/xxxx.wag files are reversed.
E.G. the first one you see is the rear one. So for a tender loco the Loco Coupling statement is Bar...........Chain and the Tender Coupling statement is Chain............Bar.
This is not how the 'Edit/Edit this unit' button display is. That is correct, the top one is Front the bottom is Rear. As it says.
This has rambled a bit in trying to give all relevant info I hope you follow it.
EDIT:- I have looked at the S&D 7Fs and they all display the correct way round.
Good luck
Doug