Atomic Systems

You get some people who ask strange questions.

How long is the next train to Brighton? About 4 coaches (Probably a popular one)

Whats the difference between a single and a return? A return is when you come back

Where can I apply for a disabled railcard? Get the big leaflet from the rack behind you. Can you show me how to get it? I don't know what to do?

Whats the best way to get to Cardiff? Train?

What the cheapest way to Scotland? Walk

The train doors wouldn't open and I missed my train, can I make a complaint to the manager? Yeah, but can I ask if you pushed the flashing yellow button? No I didn't I thought the doors opened automatically.

Are the trains running on time next week? I'll let you know on the day

Are you selling tickets? your in the ticket office so yes

Can I buy bus tickets here? This is a train station, it gives you a clue what we sell here

Can I get a return to Reading via Gatwick please? Yep would you be travelling from Gatwick via Guildford, Clapham Junction or Paddington?

[Student] Can I buy a ticket to Seven Sisters? (Refering to the cliffs near Eastbourne) and Where do I go? Take the train to London Victoria and Seven Sisters is on the Victoria Line.

The foriegn students don't like the fares you usually give them, you tell them that a cheap day return to London Victoria is £19 but if they travel after 09:27 and avoid returning between 16:45 and 19:15 it's £12.50. They give you a blank face thinking that you give them an even cheaper fare.

Are these real answers given by ticket office staff? If that's the case they need either sacking for insolence or get some serious retraining.

Hehe, Nice one Ed

Keep 'em coming.

Martin - I think they are made up. Well, at least i hope so

Thanks,

Lee

Providing Intercity Services across the North

I Think all ticket office, platform staff guards and drivers have all given the 4 coach long answer lol

It is official people DO lose there brains and become sheep when going into a train station lol

Martin, you don't know how stupid people are.

How am I supposed to know if a train is running on time next week, can I borrow your crystal ball?

I've said a few of those to passengers and they have all liked the answers.

I agree that people can be stupid and ask some daft questions, but some of the questions asked above are legit, and although a joky answer can sometimes lighten the moment, some of the responses do seem a bit insolent. For example, I can understand a foreign visitor's confusion about fares - I mean, if their first language isn't English how will they comprehend the time restrictions on a saver? And is " Between 16.45 and 19.15 its £12.30 " referring to some bizzare bargaining process or price ranges?

I still remember a snotty cow at Grenoble SNCF Travel Centre reacting with an incredulous and condescending "Mais bien sur!" when I asked - in French - if trains ran from there to Geneva. I wasn't sure if we had to change, or even if they ran via Grenoble or some other route, my knowledge of the French railway system at that time being less than it is now. Clearly I wasn't a local, as my French accent isn't that good, and I just thought it was an inappropriate response to someone clearly not from the area asking a straightforward question, and left a very poor impression of SNCF which has lingered to this day ten years on. By comparison, I have to say, when I asked in faltering Italian about trains from Naples to Pompeii, and Sorrento, and attempted to ask if a break of journey was permitted on a Sorrento ticket (I never do things by half, although my Italian teacher, when I told her about it at the following week's evening class, was dead chuffed!), the guy behind the counter couldn't have been more helpful, even writing down the fare when I didn't quite catch the figure (it was in Lire and had lots of "mille" in it). Perhaps the guy in Naples was more used to tourists than the witch in Grenoble, but when I've visited other less touristy places I've usually found people willing to help, especially if they see you trying to communicate in their own language.

Whenever I've encountered a foreign visitor who needed help in the UK, I've always made sure I speak clearly and simply, or even respond in their own language if I'm able to. It's just plain good manners.

or even respond in their own language if I'm able to.

Never figured out how to do that with American tourists in StAndrews..... though possibly because i speak more Dundonian and Fifer than the average person in StAndrews.

Americans call platforms, Tracks.

Can be confusing at first lol.

I sell tickets on the KWVR, and Americans have to be the worse!

"Hey dude, I want a ticket to Haworth! "(they prononce it Hay-worth)

"Does the train run on this track or another one?"

"Erm...theres only one track sir!"

"Ohh. Ok then! Erm...Quick question, do you use those trendy electric trains that we got from Leeds?"

(do we have overhead lines?)

"Erm...no sir, we don't have over head lines"

"Oh ok!"


Some amusing comments made over the phone at Haworth while I was working there.

"Hello KWVR etc.."

"Hello I'm wanting to travel on your railway"

"Yes, where would you like to travel from?"

"What? You have more than one station?"

"Yes we have 6"

After much converstion, she then aksed the folowing,

"How big is the circle your trains run on(!?!?!)"

"Erm...er...Pardon?"

"How big is the circle? Is it about 500m?"

"Ermm...we do not have a circle we have a continuous line which goes up the airedale valley, and the route is 5 miles long"

The converastion went on for about 5 minuites with more stupid questions aksed.

However essential passanger may be, they can be a nusance!

Don't worry, they get worse at Airports!

Working with the public is not an easy job.

Working with the public is not an easy job.

Its 100 times more fun when the customer is very intoxicated.

Gazz

Actually I have to agree with Martin and MarkW on this one, I deal with some apparently very silly questions that get asked to me via UKTrainSim and you just have to remember that not everybody is as knowledgeable as you and perhaps when they know the answer they will realise it was a daft question but at the time they ask it they have no clue and are hoping someone will help them.

Whenever i've travelled on the German railways i've always been impressed with the service, even when the lady couldn't speak English (and I can't speak a word of German) we were still able to understand enough of each other to get me from Jena to Berlin on the next ICE3 coming through with a reserved first class seat (it wasn't much more expensive considering the rest of the cost of the journey - and since the day job was paying... ).

will the trains be running on time next week

How about, "there are no planned interruptions at this time but I would advise you re-check before you set out on your journey just to make sure as things may change between now and then".

Can I buy bus tickets here?

Perfectly reasonable question, I can buy a london travel card at a main line train station that is equally good for buses.

Whats the difference between a single and a return?

Any numpty can see that they are referring to COST.

How long is the next train to Brighton?

How long UNTIL the next train.

Where can I apply for a disabled railcard?

You'll find a leaflet on the rack behind you sir, just follow all the instructions on there and if you get stuck there is a telephone number that you can call for advice.

What the cheapest way to Scotland?

It depends on where you want to go in Scotland, but for Edinburgh you can take a train from here to Victoria, you'll need to take the tube over to Euston and then get a Virgin service from Euston direct to Edinburgh. I can get you to Euston and when you get there just ask at the ticket office for the best price to get to Scotland.

The public can't be assumed to know anything about the railways or the procedures that you've trained to understand like the back of your hand - so taking the mick out of them is doing nothing to help the image of the railways at all, even if they do give you a polite laugh back.

Matt.

I agree with Matt.

The questions are sensible but phrased badly. Helping the customer by asking them to explain the question and answer it is better for your employer than taking the *iss out of them.

I think this was more of a thread that was meant to be taken in light humour with more made up answers than genuine ones, rather than a complains handling course.